First Time Parents, Let's Come Closer.

Being a parent is one of the most rewarding roles, but it can also be the most challenging. Many new parents worry about not knowing what to do. But don't worry, there are practical ways to overcome these concerns, so you can enjoy the experience of caring for your little one.

Feelings After Baby is Born

It's normal to have mixed feelings during pregnancy and after your baby is born. You may feel happy, loving, and overwhelmed, but at other times you may feel stressed, frustrated, or even sad.

The role of parent can feel harder if you:

Living away from family or support.

If you and your partner have to move away or live far from your parents and family, being a new parent will feel much harder and the fear of asking for help from people around you who you don't know well is very real. The support of each partner will be needed more than a couple who lives close to family.

Taking care of a baby alone without a partner.

This is the hardest thing when you and your baby are just entering the adjustment stage with sleep deprivation, breastfeeding routines, body-clock adjustments, self-care, lifestyle changes and many other new things. We have some tips that you can apply to help you deal with all of this.

Sometimes, the reality doesn’t match the expectations between the life of a new parent on social media and the situation at home. You might be worried if:

Labor did not go as planned.
Breastfeeding is harder than expected.
You have bad days and feel overwhelmed.

Many parents feel confused and lack confidence at first. But, as time goes by, you will get used to it and your confidence will grow.
It's also normal to feel upset or tired with your baby. However, if these negative feelings:

Very strong and intense,
It doesn't go away, or
Keeps appearing over and over again,

It's best to talk to your doctor or paediatric nurse. This could be a sign of perinatal anxiety or depression .

Common Concerns of New Parents

It's normal to feel anxious about caring for a baby. Below are some common concerns and tips to help you feel more at ease.

Fear of Baby Dying While Sleeping

Many parents worry that their babies will choke or experience SUDI (Sudden Unexpected Death in Infancy) or SIDS (Sudden Infant Death Syndrome).

Here's how to reduce the risk:

Always put your baby to sleep in a supine position .
Make sure the baby's face and head are not covered.
Avoid exposure to cigarette smoke before and after the baby is born.
Don't let the baby get too hot.
Breastfeed your baby if possible.
Give a pacifier at bedtime.

The safest place for a baby to sleep during the first 6 months is in a crib in the same room as you.

Worried About Not Being Able to Love a Baby

It's normal to feel unattached to your baby. Especially if your baby cries a lot and constantly wants to be close to you. This bonding process can take days, weeks, or even months.

You may feel a mix of emotions. If you feel very depressed or disconnected from your baby, it's a good idea to talk to your doctor or paediatrician.

Fear of Injuring Baby's Fontanel

Fontanels, or soft spots on a baby's head, may look fragile, but they're actually stronger than you might think.

As long as you hold your baby's head gently and carefully, there is no problem touching or stroking that area.

Fear of Dropping the Baby

Many parents worry about dropping their baby. To reduce the risk, you can:

Make sure the house is safe and there are no objects that could cause tripping.
Check the carpet or mats to make sure there are no creases.
Make sure the stairs are not blocked by objects.
Walk carefully when carrying a baby.

Worried About Baby Not Developing Normally

It's natural to compare your baby's development with that of other babies, but remember that every child grows at his or her own pace.

About 1 in 7 children may experience developmental delays (stunting). Therefore, it is important to monitor the development of the baby regularly through the Child Health Book and check-ups with the doctor.

Trust your instincts. If you feel something is wrong, consult your pediatrician or doctor.

Fear of Baby Crying Too Much

Newborns often cry, especially in the first few weeks. Crying usually peaks at 6 to 8 weeks and can last for several hours.

On average, babies aged 6 to 8 weeks cry about 2 to 3 hours per day , especially in the afternoon or evening. This habit usually decreases by 3 to 4 months of age.

Call your doctor immediately if:

The baby's cry appears suddenly and sounds different.
You feel something is wrong.
You have trouble dealing with your baby's crying and feel overwhelmed.

Worried About Baby Sleeping Too Much

Some babies do sleep more than others, and that's normal. The average newborn sleeps about 16 hours a day , and by 2 to 3 months of age, they're sleeping about 15 hours a day.

In the first few weeks, your baby should wake up 8 to 12 times to feed each day. If you have concerns about your baby's sleeping or feeding patterns, talk to your pediatrician or lactation consultant.

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Worried About Financial Problems

Many parents worry about their ability to financially support their baby. Starting a budget before the baby is born and planning for it afterward can help you feel more at ease. Remember, if you don't have the money to buy expensive baby equipment, it's not really a "third world problem." A multi-million dollar UV sterilizer doesn't guarantee that you and your partner, or even your baby, will be happier than sterilizing the old-fashioned way, which is by steeping hot water like mothers in the 2000s.

Resources and Support

If you are having difficulty, there is a range of support you can take advantage of:

Pediatricians and nurses can help monitor your baby's health and development.
Lactation consultants can provide advice on breastfeeding. For example, Lactashare or Pojok Kasih .
Parenting helpline services are ready to listen and give advice.

In Indonesia, the government provides various forms of support for new parents, especially through family health and welfare programs. Here are some examples of relevant government programs to support parents and children:

Stunting Reduction : The government through the BKKBN and the Ministry of Health focuses on preventing and handling stunting. This program includes nutritional interventions, such as providing additional food with animal protein to toddlers and pregnant women, as well as revitalizing integrated health posts throughout Indonesia.
Family Support Team (TPK) : The government formed a TPK consisting of midwives, family planning counselors, and PKK members. They assist families by providing counseling, facilitating medical referrals, and distributing social assistance at the local level.
Improving Maternal and Child Health Services : The government also distributes medical equipment, such as USG to health centers, to detect health problems in fetuses early and ensure that babies are born healthy. In addition, anthropometric devices are provided at integrated health posts to monitor child growth according to WHO standards.
Family Planning Program (FP) : The KB program aims to help families plan pregnancies well and reduce the number of unmet KB needs. With more accessible contraceptive services, families can plan pregnancies at the right time to reduce the risk of stunting and other health problems.

These various initiatives demonstrate the government's commitment to supporting families so that Indonesian children grow up healthy and develop optimally.

Hopefully this reading will be useful in reducing your worries.